Facebook Rules For Mothers of Teens

16 Feb

I have a lot of my 17 year old sister’s friends on my Facebook. I also have some of her friends’ mothers, as well as other mothers of teens. Lately, I have come across several cringe-worthy status updates, pictures, or comments from some of these mothers. So! I present to you…

Facebook Rules For Mothers of Teens

1.) Your daughter and her “bestie” are arguing again? Stay out of it. They will likely be friends again tomorrow IF you refrain from telling Facebook how the BFF is just jealous of how gorgeous/awesome/smart your daughter is. When things go beyond typical teenage girl tiffs, by all means, step in…talk your daughter and the other teen’s parents. Bashing the ex-BFF on Facebook makes you look like an immature bully.

2.) For the love of all things alcoholic, DO NOT duckface. Definitely do not duckface WITH your teen. I don’t think this needs further explanation. When you are 40, it isn’t cute.

3.) Do not post pictures of your daughter dressed for the club or in her bathing suit while bending over or pushing her boobs together..on your own Facebook. It’s weird. When said picture’s caption also reads, “Isn’t my daughter a HOTTIE???”, you start looking like Fancy’s mom. For realz. Better yet, if it’s meant to be a “sexy” picture, just don’t post it.

4.) Save the drama for your mama, not your daughter’s mama. If your status CONSISTENTLY reads, “zOMG! Soooo much drama! I will not be a part of this immature crap. Some people REALLY need to grow up!!!!!”, we’ll all know who REALLY needs to grow up.

5.) Do not add your teen’s male friends to your Facebook, then proceed to post “sexy”, half-dressed photos of yourself.

6.) Do not share your family drama. It can cause serious embarrassment for your child (“Omg, did you see where Johnny’s mom said that his dad is an alcoholic and no good piece of shit?!”) and no one wants to read that shit. It embarrasses the rest of us FOR your child.

7.) ~*~{TyPiNg LyKe DiS iS UnAcCePtAbLe.}~*~ Your child’s friends might think you are cool. The rest of us will consider shanking you. Also, leave the txt spk 2 ur teen.


8.) Not everyone needs to know that you caught your sweet Sarah blowing her boyfriend instead of doing homework. Seriously, no.

9.) Pictures of you partying with your teen? Yeaaaa…NO. Not cute.

Possibly a more personal one:
10.) Don’t taunt your teen’s boyfriend or girlfriend with snide remarks. The older sister of your teen’s significant other might go all Bon Qui Qui on you.. just sayin’.

You’re welcome.

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16 Responses to “Facebook Rules For Mothers of Teens”

  1. mrsmomx6 February 17, 2012 at 1:53 am #

    OMG! Not only is this horrifying to realize that is reality for some people, but…this is freaking hillarious!Sharonhttp://sharon-moms-madhouse.com/

  2. Lisa February 17, 2012 at 2:11 am #

    Great tips and I love the graphics you used in this post!

  3. thegirlfriendmom February 17, 2012 at 2:44 am #

    This was high-sterical! Sad but hi-sterical. I just want to see how many different ways I can spell hysterical. It's so teenager, isn't it? Great post!

    • Undomesticated Housewife February 23, 2012 at 9:00 am #

      I like doing it with hi-larious..high-larious..
      Thank you for reading! Women can be a mess these days!

  4. Bostonsmama February 17, 2012 at 4:50 am #

    This could be the best post I have ever read. I second all of it. 😀 Glad you're back, too!

  5. Jaime February 17, 2012 at 1:02 pm #

    Would love to share but the naked old woman needs to go or be blurred out. Some very true stuff in there.

  6. Jaime February 17, 2012 at 1:05 pm #

    I really want to share this article but the naked old woman pic needs to go or be blurred out. Seriously funny & true stuff there.

  7. K.A.T February 20, 2012 at 5:50 pm #

    This is why I do not have my teen on FB nor do I allow her friends on my FB. I’ve been lucky that my teen doesn’t want her own FB yet. When she does, I’ll add her to watch her but limit her access to me. I won’t even allow anyone under 18 on my FB. I prefer adult content mainly, thank you very much.

  8. Pauline February 21, 2012 at 10:49 pm #

    The scary part is that a lot of you what you are poking fun at actually happens…a crazy work we live in! Loved the post, you made me laugh!

    • Pauline February 21, 2012 at 10:59 pm #

      Meant world….oops!

    • Undomesticated Housewife February 23, 2012 at 8:56 am #

      Thanks! And, yes, unfortunately, I see this stuff actually going on far too often. Awesome, right?

  9. Evanthia of Merelymothers February 23, 2012 at 5:56 pm #

    Fantastic rules! As a former high-school teacher who is now FB “friends” with former students (who have since graduated), I think long and hard about EVERYTHING I post on FB. And it’s probably for the best 🙂 I wish some of my students would do the same though!

    • Undomesticated Housewife February 26, 2012 at 4:13 am #

      As the older sister of a 17 year old, I totally get it. She eventually changed her password once I got on there one too many times (according to her) to delete the insanity she would post! I’m like, “Dude! People know we are related! You have me listed as your sister, so when you are your dirty laundry down to the nitty-gritty, you are, basically, airing mine too! Stop!” What got me most recently and sparked the post was the catty remarks by a grown-ass woman–my sister’s boyfriend’s step-mother–about my little sister! It wasn’t actually what she said, but she posted that she had certain opinions of my sister that would be better left unsaid. Are you fucking kidding me? Why say anything at all then? Just to be an immature bitch, that’s why. What woman in her right mind does that? whew! Got myself steamed up again! Ha! Thanks for reading!

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